Thing I love #31: Dogs Whose Tongues Do Not Fit In Their Mouth

I know I just nerded out about how much I love guilty dogs, and that now I’m talking about how much I love dogs whose tongues don’t fit in their mouth. Well, I like slightly-defective animals.

Plus, this post comes with haikus.


Is my tongue too long,
Or instead my face to short?
No, seriously.

black dog_brown dog/Flickr

With a tongue this long
I can taste water, my food,
The air…and my balls.

Douglas Brown/Flickr

I know I look dumb
But I have a good excuse:
The bitches love it.


I bet if you looked
As cute as me when you slept,
You’d have a girlfriend.


Did you notice that
I am cross eyed as well?
Cannot. Control. Face.

~ tanguero ~/Flickr

So I can’t fit my
Tongue in my mouth. You dick,
Stop taking pictures.

The Pack/Flickr

I could lick a hole
Through duct-taped Kevlar chain mail
With this fucking thing.


This tiny-tongue-tip:
Too tempting to tuck ‘twixt teeth.


I am excited
That you got out the PB,
But why put it there?


I hope that my tongue
And soft paws distract you from
My vigorous farts.

Featured photo courtesy of P.J.M./Flickr


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